Court Session number 2!

Well.. I will just start at the beginning.   The driver and staff picked us up at 10:30.   We then picked up the van full of people again and headed to the courthouse.   We all walked in together and met the BH director as well as another lady who spoke for us outside the courtroom.   We all hung out together in the hallway... and the ladies were all very kind to us.    We visited about lots of things like the weather and how the trip home was, etc...  we talked about their New Year's with their families and told them about our Christmas at home with Bay and Brook.   
After about 15 minutes they call our names and into the courtroom we go.   The room is much smaller than before... and the room we used on Jan. 14th was small.  This room was about 20 X 20 max.. and there were about 14 people crammed in it.     The judge started by having everyone introduce themselves.   She then asked if anyone had anything they wanted to say.   The BH Director spoke up and stated that her Dr's needed to speak first if that was ok.. cause they needed to leave.  She agreed to this and the head of the Dr's for the BH went first (we'd never seen her before).   She spoke of the twins medical history from Birth until now... and spoke for a LONG time.    The BH Dr. then spoke as well and confirmed all the things that the Director said as well.     As I sat there listening to the list of things the girls have been through and faced....  my heart just broke... as I knew they had been alone their entire little lives while facing so many challenges.   I quickly thought that I never wanted them to face another Dr's apt... or issue and not KNOW that their Mama and Papa are there with them always and forever.  

 However, I quickly remembered what the Lord spoke to me about 2 1/2 years ago... and that was that he had my babies in the palm of his hand.   I KNOW that he has held F and G gently in his hand from the time they were conceived in their Mothers womb... and for this I am SO very grateful!   
The Judge questioned the BH Dr. VERY extensively.    I am still amazed at the things she asked her.   She was very forceful and asked her if she was 100% sure that we could provide all that the twins need, etc... she just kept asking and really questioned her.   The Dr. was so very kind and continued to reassure the judge that she had NO doubt that we were the perfect parents for the twins. 

After that ?ing ended... she then asked which of us planned to speak first...  I of course drew the short straw between Phil and I... and gave my speech first.    I covered most everything imaginable... and reassured her (yes.. with HUGE tears) that we just felt and knew the girls were our daughters.   I only left out a small portion of my speech.... and overall remembered everything I wanted to say.   I felt that it went good... and most importantly I didn't BAWL uncontrollably... I got chocked up a couple times.. but, held it in and think the judge could genuinely see and feel that we loved the girls so much already.  

She then asked me questions and drilled me... I answered honestly and to the best of my ability.   She then said she had no further ?'s... and it was Phil's turn.    He gave his short speech... she drilled him...  He got chocked up.... all the women in the room were smiling and VERY touched.  :)   I think they are just in awe of the fact that he wants and is willing to be the Papa to 4 daughters! :)     He answered well..and he sat down.    Svetlana then told the judge that we had some video's of our time with the girls if she'd like to view them... and we shared pictures of the newly re-decorated room for F and G.  The judge wanted to see the videos... so I sat up the computer and played the video from yesterday for the judge and the entire court.   The ladies who wanted to view it crowded in behind me and the judge.. behind her seat.  (very NOT American... )     This is the video that I want to share with all of you... but, can't get to upload... anyway the ladies as well as the judge were ALL smiles... you CAN NOT watch this without a smile and see and feel the love... and at the end of it... Faith says in Russian to me...  "Mama, can we just go home now?"    They all heard this and the judge just looks at me and smiles!  I knew then that she has a heart!!!! :)     I then showed them a portion of another video from back in Nov... during bonding.  
The director of child services then spoke and she literally made me BAWL.   She said that in all her years as a professional.. doing this job.. she's never seen such progress in 2 children during a bonding time.   She also went on to say that she was so very impressed with our bonding... and how we played so appropriately with the girls.   We incorporated learning into the environment and she had never seen such a wonderful environment made for children to learn.  She said it was truly a 'teacher environment' and that you could see the love in both our eyes as we look at those girls.  She said she's honestly never seen such a strong bond and that she whole HEARTEDLY  supports our  adoption of these twins.   :)  

The director then speaks and agrees with her and says that it's truly obvious that my being an SLP is such a positive thing.   She also brags and says she's seen such HUGE gains in both girls, etc...  

I just had to smile inside.. as I watched and heard the Lord's favor!    It's truly amazing that the Lord has orchestrated this very day from the time that he led me to be and SLP.   Everything in our lives truly points to this point and we are SO very thankful for the Lord's amazing mercies and grace! 
At one point the Dr even said... that these girls need a FULL-TIME Speech-Language Pathologist!   :)   LOL!!!  Doesn't get much better than that! ;) 

At this point we've been in the courtroom for about 1 1/2 hours... it was a LONG time... 
They judge asks us some more ?'s... basically the same things over again..    

Everyone felt very good about the entire session and you could just feel the peace in the courtroom.   I just KNEW she was going to give her decision today... then next thing I know she is saying that our next session will be towards the end of the month... YES.. the END of Jan!    The revolt in the room again begins.... and the ladies FIGHT for us again.   She then changes her mind and says that she can work us into her schedule on the 11th at 2:00 pm.      

The ladies again are SO upset that she didn't give her verdict today... and say that she has NO reason to not give a YES!    They were saying.. that she already knows she's planning to say yes... and it's so silly to drag it out another few days.... but, it's ok.     We feel good about it.... and just continue to know that the Lord has a plan... and that plan is perfect!!!  ;) 
Svetlana says the 11th should be VERY simple.   Gather in the courtroom.. she'll ask if anyone has any changes or wants to add anything....  then she'll recess.. and come back in and give her positive verdict! 
;) 

We then came back to the apt. and made some lunch... whew... it was a morning! 
We went to visit F and G tonight from 4 - 6 and had another GREAT visit...  
Here are some pictures of the fun:   
(well.. forget the pics..  after another 45 mins. trying to load these... I'm giving up..  Svetlana was even saying tonight that the internet is really acted strange in this part of the city...   who knows why, but it is..  I've had fits just staying connected to get this typed out...)

so..  we have our last court session on Jan. 11th...  
Tomorrow is Christmas here in Kazakhstan... so nothing is open... the director said that we could go ahead and visit F and G tomorrow...but, made sure we all realized she was making a special privilege allowing us to... we're so thankful for that! :)

Svetlana has invited us to her home for Christmas dinner with her family tomorrow... we are honored and very excited to experience that....    We'll post pics (hopefully) and details soon! 
Thanks for the love, support, and prayers....
We are so very blessed by all of you!

and.. we are so thrilled that we are one step closer to having the girls home forever!! 

... and we're back!!!

I have so much to write and post about... but, wanted to start with the BEST part first...  after 19 days (79 hours of travel to get home.... 35 hours of travel to return.... TONS of love and hugs from Bay and Brook...  Christmas celebrations with the families.... as well as a COMPLETE redo and redecorate of Faith and Grace's room)... we are finally back in Pavlodar.  We arrived yesterday (Jan. 4th) @ around 11 am...  we immediatly found out we couldn't see F and G until today... we also had no internet until today... but, at 8:45 am on Jan. 5th....   we walked into the babyhouse after 19 days of MISSING them... and you can see below what their responses were:   :)
(Make sure you scroll to bottom of the blog to pause the music to hear the excitement and SCREAMS in the video!!! : ))

(OK... after trying to get this video to load for 2 hours... I am giving up.... I am SO sad that I can't get it to load..   I tried LOTS of things... using several recommendations of downsizing it.. etc...  and it still won't load... I'm assuming it's Kaz. internet... or the fact that I'm not techy... but, regardless... I am giving up... for now..  can anyone reading this email me some tips? )

(They screamed and ran and SCREAMED loud and jumped and threw themselves into our arms... they hugged and kissed and hugged and kissed us...over and over and over! )

YES!  You heard correctly...  Faith said to me... Mama, can we go home now?  ;)  yes... that's a tear jerker!!

After about 3 minutes... Grace put both her hands on both my cheeks... and after I kissed her said, "Mama, I LOVE YOU!"   (In English... as plain as day!)
They remembered us... and it was a GRAND day!   The Lord kept them... and I have NO doubt he was rocking them everynight for me!  :)

The caregivers said they have cried and waited on us... she used the word "cried!"    We had a GREAT day with them... as you can imagine.  
Here are a few pictures:




LOL!  Grace LOVED the sunglasses that we brought... and she LOVED it when I put on Faith's!!  :) 
This girl was SO excited to see us.. and just grinned HUGE the entire time!  :)



My precious Faith... :)   Goodness I sure love these babies...  My heart comletley melted into when she said to me... "Mama, Can we go home now?"   Awe..... 

Grace... This baby is incredible!  She did not forget ONE word of English... and was quick to say it all and show us that she knew it!!  :)   She continues to amaze me...  We are SO SO SO very blessed!

I just had to include this one... Grace.. You are such a CUTIE!  :)

An attempt at a family picture of all 4 of us...  an attempt!

WOW!   They were so excited with the new shoes, hair bow, and cute girl stuff that I brought!   It's amazing how excited they are at the smallest things...

Let me just tell you that while we were gone....  (and we weren't gone that long) Winter has definitly arrived.   It's colder than you can even imagine.. I mean COLD..  Right now it's -24 degrees F.  That's COLD!   I know we said before that we've never felt temps. so cold.. but, we continue to be amazed... they were correct when they said that it wasn't really cold yet... oh my goodness!   It's beyond cold! 

It physically hurts to breath the air in... your chest hurts after a few breaths....  IT'S COLD!

We have court in the morning (Jan. 6th) @ 11:00 am... so that will be Jan. 5th (Wed) night at 11 PM for most of you!

PLEASE say a prayer and think of us....  

I have so many things to post and tell all of you about....  finding the time and energy to type it all out... but, for now we have to focus on tomorrow....

we're praying that tomorrow will be it...  and that the judge will be so moved that she'll make a decision tomorrow and not make us have a 3rd court date of Jan. 11th.  The lawyer says this is definilty possible.   Please trust God with us that his will will be completed!

(and that somehow - someway there will be a HUGE miracle and she'll waive the waiting time after court... so we don't have to leave the girls here again and come back for them!)  

Thanks for the love, support, and prayers... maybe by this time tomorrow... we'll be officially the parents of 4 precious girls!!  Thank you Lord for you amazing favor tomorrow!!!

Night from Pavlodar!



(please email video posting tips... I'm so sad that it would load.. :( )

Merry Christmas Faith and Grace!

Dear Faith and Grace,
There was not one second that went by today (Christmas) that we didn't think of you!   We love you so much..  we prayed for you and trust and know that Jesus was holding you both in his arms today... on this last Christmas Day that you are NOT home forever!
We have been waiting for 4 Christmas's... thinking this has to be the last Christmas without our babies home....  Just know that we love you...  We all talked about you nonstop... and just know that we can't wait for you to be home forever! 
You are LOVED precious babies....  by ALL of us!
We love you and are coming soon!!   Rest my sweet girls ~ in HIS arms... 

(Note:  Go to bottom of blog to pause music playing before listening to this song.)

Dec. 17, 2010 - Our last visit for a while...

We went to the BH @ 4 pm today...   When we arrived the caregiver quickly begin telling us that when we didn't arrive this morning at our 'normal' time...  the girls were very sad... and then as the day progressed and we didn't come... they got MAD.   The caregiver said they were distraught and upset ALL DAY.     :( 
Symbat explained to her that we were leaving... that the judge decided on our court date of Jan 11th... and we have to go back to America due to expiring Visas, and that this would be our last visit until close to Jan 11th. She was SHOCKED about the court date as well... and said that we had been here in Kazak. visiting the girls for a LONG time.... what was the deal?!


That is every ones response. :) Smile and remember that God has a plan!

Ok... so we asked first about putting pics on the girls beds... They allowed us to tape 2 pictures up on each girls bed.
The girls were VERY excited. As we started to go into the room where they sleep.. Phil grabbed the camera... and guess what... it won't turn on. (batteries are ALL dead... we guess!)... Symbat had her camera and took the pictures... I borrowed her camera and downloaded them... however, you can't see much of the room. (but, it's better than nothing)
Here they are:


This is Faith's bed.  There were 13 beds in this small room.   I knew what the room would look like... but, it was heartbreaking at the same time!   I KNOW that the Lord's presence will surround that bed in the center back... as well as the one in the front against the wall! 




Still working on Faith's bed.... they were SO excited about putting the pictures on their beds.  :)




Here we are working on Stella's bed.   Yes... those are tears in my eyes.   I know it's God's plan, but let me just say it hurts.. and it hurts DEEP. 

 I as well as Symbat explained to the girls that when they are laying down to sleep they will remember and KNOW that Mama and Papa LOVE THEM VERY MUCH and that we are coming back!    We aren't sure how much they understand... Symbat agrees that they don't/didn't seem to understand. 
As we came out of the bedroom... I was BAWLING.    One of the caregivers saw me and smiled SO sweetly... I asked Symbat (while BAWLING - with the caregiver watching me) to PLEASE tell them that we love them and that we are coming back.    The caregiver was so sweet.. and said she will tell them every time she works.    She told Symbat that F and G have been waiting a LONG time on us.. their Mama and Papa.. and they will NOT forget us.    She was so sweet..at least I know ONE caregiver will talk to them about us.   The bummer is that they rotate so much... it goes days before they have the same caregiver again.... urg..   
We wouldn't be leaving tomorrow if it wasn't God's plan.. this has to be the best thing for all of us...  We keep telling ourselves this. 
We are leaving these babies in the Lord's hand...  He will take really good care of them.

We left a gift and cards for them... Svetlana is going to give the cards to the director.  (we wrote on the front what days to give them to the girls)    Symbat translated it all in Russian... so the caregivers can read the cards to them.    Svetlana hopes that since we are giving them to the director that she will for sure get them to F and G on the correct days.    We left New Year's Day presents for them with Svetlana as well.  She is going to go see them and give them the presents as well as watch their New Year's production.   We are so thankful for this.   She said she would try to send us some pics via email!  

Prayer request:   We realized that our I-171H form expires about one week before we will most likely be bringing the girls home...  (meaning we'll have to have a home study update.. and pay oh about $1000 total again for this immigration letter from the US government as well as a HS update.)  
This is crucial and could delay us even longer if we have to redo it...    We pointed it out to Svetlana tonight and she was JUST sick...
She is going to go visit the lawyer on Monday and explain the situation again.    If the judge would waive the 15 day waiting period after court... problem would be solved!   We need to gain one week somehow/someway... or we're delayed due to this form.. yet again..  
PLEASE pray that Svetlana will receive good news with the judge on Monday... and that when we book tickets to come back.. the prices will be SO inexpensive that we'll be shocked!!!   Lord, we KNOW you have ALL things under control....  and as I've said everyday for weeks.... We choose to TRUST you!

Here's the travel itinerary:
Leave Pavlodar apartment @ 7:30 am on Saturday morning.
Flight to Almaty @ 9:20 am  (2 hour flight)
Wait in Almaty for 15 hours.   :(
4:20 am Sunday morning - fly to Frankfort
Frankfort to Chicago
Chicago to OKC - supposed to arrive in OKC at 2:08 pm Sunday afternoon (OK time)
2:15 ish - GRAB Bay and Brook and melt into an emotional pile!   :)  
Go eat some REALLY good Oklahoma food!!!   Texas Roadhouse?   YUM!!!  
Sunday evening... Christmas Caroling via trailer (hayride)... back to church for hot chocolate and yummy goodies.     
Life resumes at home....  (on the outside... on the inside.. 1/2 my heart is in Pavlodar, Kazakhstan!)

Dec. 16, 2010 - Update!

I haven't posted pics from the last 3 days... so I thought I'd post a few!
Here are a couple of my favorites from yesterday! 


Doesn't get much sweeter than this... :) 



When we arrived yesterday for our visit the children in their group were just changing out of their costumes for the New Years production.    The caregivers put G and F's back on them so I could take a picture!   Despite the look on Grace's face... she was VERY excited to put it back on for a picture! (honestly!)

I just love this picture.  I hope they realize how much we LOVE them!

This is from today.   We decided to 'break' a rule and put on some chap stick.   They were SO excited!  

Here I told them to show Papa how pretty we are...   Grace is such a hoot!  :)



NO explanation needed... isn't that precious?! 

We did some shopping today... It was a busy day!   We found a couple of animals to leave with the girls.   Svetlana is going to go and visit them on New Years and take them a present from us.    The caregivers/director said that we can also put some pictures on their beds tomorrow. 
I am so happy that we'll be able to do that.
I had a melt down in the middle of the visit today... and just started BAWLING!    Both girls were SO sweet... however, Faith wiped away one of my tears... kissed my cheek and said very softly and kindly, "I love you Mama!"    (with NO prompting or anyone saying anything....)   MELTED my heart! Grace was so sweet as well.. and brought over a book and wanted to read with me.. (cause I always read to them ; ))
We talked to them about us leaving, etc.. through Symbat today... we aren't sure how much they really understand. 
Despite the pain and agony that we feel... we know that this is evidently God's plan... (for us to leave them)... so we know he will take perfect care of them.
He spoke to my heart YEARS ago... that, "he had them in the palm of his hand... and honestly that was a better place that with us!"    so.... we are resting in that.
Busy day tomorrow... our last day here.

oh...  and as we were taking the girls back to their room today...  (I was carrying Faith)  Faith touches my cheek and turns my face towards hers and says to me.. " Mama... Violetta Mama Machina (car) go... PLEASE?!"    She repeated this three times in the most pitiful, sad face...
she was asking to go with us in the car... begging me... she said "please" in English...  
Thank you Lord for the strength I know you are going to give us...  cause I know you will be carrying me when I walk out of that babyhouse tomorrow..
HUGE SIGH!
Lord, We trust you!   

We are coming home...

I am just going to state some facts.. cause I know everyone is wondering..
Svetlana was not able to get anything done about our court date.     It is officially Jan. 11th.   There is NOTHING that can be done.

We are coming home... we've spent LOTS of time on Skype and Internet trying to figure out how to get home... when, how, etc...
it was a mess due to Kaz. independence day being tomorrow.
We leave Pavlodar on Sat. morning...   so we'll get to see the girls 2 more times before leaving.  We will arrive in OKC on Sunday afternoon @ 2:00 pm.  (Bay and Brook... we can't wait to see you!)

I will write more tomorrow...  way to emotionally and physically drained to even type right now.   I just wanted to let everyone know what was going on. 
We are ok... we know (even though we are very disappointed) that the Lord has this all under control.   His timing and plan is WAY better than ours... and we TRUST him!   

PLEASE pray for Faith and Grace that they will understand and know that we are coming back soon...

Blessings...

Court - or Interview Round 1 - Dec. 14, 2010

I don't even know where to start...
ok.. after the bh visit this morning (which was another great visit!)... we came back to apt... ate a few bites of lunch... (not much.. we were SICK!).... and prepared for court or our 1st interview process.   The driver and translator picked us up at 3:30pm... we then picked up lawyer, the rep. from the DOE, and the Director of Guardianship at their offices.   We had a VAN full!   They were all so kind and assured us even in the vehicle to not be nervous.. that all would be ok!  :)

We arrived at the courthouse @ 3:55...   We quickly saw the BH director and sat with her.   We waited for about10 minutes and then went into a VERY small room... we could not all fit in it.. so we moved to a larger room.    It was not anything like the courtrooms in America....    There was a large desk (for the judge),  and then smaller desks for lawyers and the court reporter.    We sat directly behind Svetlana (Lawyer) and the BH director.    The judge entered the room.   Everyone stood.   She proceeded to ask questions...   and everyone identified themselves.     She then looked through our paperwork and asked LOTS of ?'s to us as well as Svetlana.    Last night when preparing our speeches we found an error on our financial sheet.   My annual salary was incorrect (a typo) thus making the entire form INACCURATE... we were devastated and struggled with what to do.   We decided to tell Svetlana and confess and hope for the best.    Svetlana explained this error and that we only realized/saw it last night.... and the judge was fine with us just correcting the info... (WHEW!!!  Thank you LORD... this potentially could have meant NO court until our social worker redos this form and sends it to us here!)...
so... she proceeds.... she had been looking through the papers for a LONG time before ever even looking at us... I found that VERY interesting.    We were asked everything imaginable...  from financial questions, to questions about Bay and Brook, etc...   I honestly can't think of one thing that they don't know about us.. that they could have asked us.    LOTS of questions. 
This lasted until about 5 pm.    At one point the BH director was asked ?'s about F and G... their medical diagnosis and development info... she then was VERY complimentary of us... and spoke of the amazing changes she's seen in the girls.  :)
Honestly, it went VERY well..  we felt confident and good with our answers.   The judge seemed to like our answers and even smiled a few times at me.  :)   (I knew I could get a smile.. ;))    All seemed VERY good!  
The judge then says she is VERY pleased.. and will set up our official court date.    Keep in mind that we NEVER gave our prepared and memorized speeches... :)   urg!  

She begins shuffling papers and then says.... 
The official court date will be January 11th! 
 That's when the entire room GASPED!   I am not kidding you.   The director, Svetlana, the ladies from the DOE... all started talking.  They explained to her that this wasn't best for F and G... that we'd have to return to America without them.   We'd be devastated... they'd be devastated.    They ALL (I mean all of them) spoke at different times (and sometimes at the same time :))  and shared their own views about how this was NOT best for our family or the girls.   The judge argued and stood firm that she ONLY has 4 working days left in Dec. to work.    Svetlana and the other ladies in the room seriously drilled her for over 15 minutes.    They continued to FIGHT for us and F and G... it was truly incredible!     (The 16 and 17th of Dec. are Holidays here..  Kazak Independence Day)... The judge must be off days the next week... we don't know the details.  

I was fighting back tears by the time it all died down.... the women in the room where smiling so kindly at us and KNEW we were so disappointed and devastated.   They were TOO!    As we were walking out of the room they were all telling us they were SO very sorry... and it's so wrong that the officials don't care more about the children than this.... (They said this!)..  We all get into the van and they are RAVING!   They are so upset... and saying things like... it's SO stupid... why couldn't TODAYS time slot have been court instead of her ridiculous "interview"!    They all said that they have NO idea what she'll even ask us in court... cause it was all covered today.   What is the deal? 
Svetlana is just sick... she was teary eyed with me.    She suggested we go get some coffee to talk.   Svetlana, Symbat, Garnadi (driver and Svetlana's dad) all went to Krendal's.    Svetlana says it's NOT over yet...  she's called a friend who can pull some strings.    We should know more tomorrow.  (Thurs and Fri. are holidays here.)
She  says she is hope full.. but, doesn't know if anything can be done.   She is trying.. and we are hoping and praying that we'll hear good news tomorrow.

Ok... so we walked away without really learning anything...
except that we now know that this entire group of officials 150% approves us adopting G and F.    We felt very good about the judge...   We know it will be granted.  
While setting at Krendal's we felt led to share with the staff about our desire to come back here (aka Mission's trip) and do something BIG for this BH as well as Kichary.    Svetlana and Symbat were very excited.   Svetlana said she was IN 100%...   she could arrange things on this end and that would be an incredibly wonderful thing to be a part of!   We are excited...  we are laying the ground work for HUGE things... and it's all God's plan.

Yes... we are VERY disappointed that court wasn't decided and we still don't know..
the thought of leaving F and G and possibly having to come back 2X's is overwhelming...(for many reasons from the girls to finances!)
 but, we saw in the midst of this INSANE crazy mess of a journey.... God's hand!       I have to wonder how many of those women today.... who were fighting for us will be involved in the mission trip.... God has a plan.   This is just the beginning!     Maybe those ladies need to be around us more.... maybe someway they are seeing Jesus in us...  If one person here sees Jesus in us..we can be delayed... It's ALL for him and about him anyway... right?!   YES... most definitely!

We have been so encouraged and uplifted by the incredible amount of love and support we've felt from around the world.    We are so so so TRULY blessed!
Please keep praying.... wouldn't it be awesome if they call.. and we have COURT tomorrow?   God could do that...   :)  
or if that isnt' his will....  we'll be coming back after the new year for court!
We are yours God.... Faith, Grace, Bay and Brook are yours!     We will rejoice and give you all the praise and glory when we are all 6 together forever!
Thank you Lord for continuing to provide, strengthen, and be exactly what we need you to be!
God has a plan... and WE TRUST HIM!